Notes to self
by 0n3dgeGaming
Summary: So there's a nine month gap between 'ReBirth: Guardians' and 'Now What'... During this time, the protagonist from ReBirth: Guardians decides to spend his free time writing notes to self on things to both do, and NOT do. This is the compiled writings of said notes.


**(Author's Note)**

 **Whats going on everyone! 0n3dgeGaming here!**

 **So this story is more of a funny idea that came to me after re-reading through chapter 43 of ReBirth: Guardians.**

 **So, without further ado…!**

 **ONTO THE STORY!**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hyperdimension Neptunia. The property is owned by Idea Factory and Compile Heart. Please support the official thing.**

 **(LINE BREAK)**

 _So now that I'm back in the Ultradimension, I found a list of Notes to self that Author me left behind, and so, I decided to continue it._

 **Note to self: Don't blast careless whisper over the ENTIRETY of Planeptune, no matter how funny it seems to you in post.**

 _There is a fine line between funny and hilarious._

 _Besides, it didn't last THAT long._

 _Histoire: It took us 5 hours to find where you were broadcasting it, and 8 more to get it to stop._

 _...I stand by my statement._

 **Note to self: Don't tell Blanc that you have made a model of her, and then hand her a wooden board. Someone is going to die.**

 _There really isn't anything needed to be said on this. I'm just lucky one of the basilicom's guards was close by. He made an excellent sacrifice._

 **Note to self: Don't tell Neptune that there's a contest where she'll win a lifetime supply of pudding if she eats a metric tone of eggplants.**

 _She put herself into a coma to stop herself from eating eggplants._

 _She barely made it through 3 of them..._

 **Note to self: Don't send repeated fake fan mail that's really just smut to Noire.**

 _It was only a matter of time before she realized where it was all coming from…_

 **Note to self: If the goddesses ever go to R18 island, don't let Tex follow.**

 _There's a story behind this one. (As it seems for most of these)_

 _Apparently I wasn't watching Tex when Plutia and the other goddesses were going to R18 for the day._

 _We found them on one of the beaches covered in Dogoo._

 _Most of them needed therapy. It's hilarious in retrospect and EXCELLENT blackmail material._

 **Note to self: The following are no longer allowed in serious meetings with the goddesses.**

 _Paintball guns_

 _Bubble guns_

 _Nerf guns_

 _Flares_

 _Tex_

 _Extremely sharp pencils_

 _Measuring tape (don't ask)_

 _Cardboard cutouts of Bryce_

 _(List will be updated if anything is added)_

 **Note to self: Under no circumstances are you to, and I quote: 'Go on a magical adventure to find the almighty rod of bacon'.**

 _Me and G1 got lost on an island for almost a week. We only survived thanks TO said rod of bacon._

 **Note to self: Don't dig an 8 foot hole in the ground, before dropping someone down the hole, covering said hole with a sheet of fiberglass, and then proceeding to make money off of: 'Edgar'. Side note: Remember to let Noire out of the hole.**

 _Technically, G1 started that one._

 _He did pay me as well so..._

 _Also, she got out like a while ago._

 _Let's just say I couldn't get away with 'G1 paid me to'._

 **Note to self: Do not give Nepgear access to the T-virus, we don't want to deal with another really cringy student film.**

 _Nothing to say here._

 **Note to self: Blanc's books are off limits. We don't need another incident on our hands.**

 _Caustration isn't something fun to look at…_

 **Note to self: Don't join Vert in a 3 day gaming session of ANYTHING.**

 _Vert was getting me setup with 4 goddesses online._

 _We went on for longer than we expected._

 _I was hospitalized due to dehydration._

 **Note to self: Don't perform a dramatic play of the Conquest ending for the Goddesses.**

 _Let's just say there was no after party…_

 **Note to self: If Nepgear asks for help with something, make sure you don't sign anything.**

 _That girl will make the fine print so FREAKING SMALL!_

 _Yeah, I think I'm fine with signing off on 'Agrees that the individual may end up with his organs out of his body', said no one ever!_

 **Note to self: Burn the evidence.**

 _Move along, nothing to see here…_

 _ ***Currently burning a large pile of blackmail material***_

 **Note to self: Today is valentin-**

 **(LINE BREAK)**

Bryce looked up, a look on his face like that of one that a man who realized he had f*cked up would wear.

"...Sh*t!"

 **(LINE BREAK)**

 **(Author's Note)**

 **So this chapter (and probably story) actually started out as a list of rules instead of 'Notes to self'. However, after taking another look at it, I decided it better to go with the route you see above.**

 **Now with that said, this will mainly be a story for me to jot down different funny scenarios that pop into my head. Helps clear up thinking space for other stories.**

 **Also, Happy Valentines Day!**

 **With that said, until next time!**

 **ALT+F4**


End file.
